Thursday 30 April 2015

Love parasite by Grant Harbison



“I’m not a nympho, honey!” she cried. “I just have a vampire vagina that cannot be denied.”
“Vampire vagina? What you should be saying is Idaho from North Carolina.”
“Honey, you know that’s not fair. I love you very much. I really do care.”
“Not fair? How can you say that when you continue to share?”
“Please don’t dismay, you know that I’m fine during the day. But try as I might, I can’t stop these urges night after night.”
“Are you saying that I shouldn’t get uptight? How can I live with a love parasite?”
“All I can say is that I’m really not sure. I have this condition with no apparent cure.”
“We’ll have to do something, something instead. What if each night I tied you to the bed?”
“No, I wouldn’t bother. If you did that I’d just thrash and holler.”
“Your carnal womanly rights I simply can’t deny, but let me be the only one. Please let me try.”
“That is so sweet my sugar honey pie, but no matter how you try, you will never satisfy.’
“What about something artificial? That should do the trick.’
“No, I tried once with a candle and it got on my wick.’
“So what do you suggest, Emma? There must be a way to sort this dilemma.”
“Go outside and find me some men. Let’s say nine, no make it ten.”
“Find ten men to share our bed? If you think I’d do that you are mad in the head. This is not working and I think we should part, because I cannot live with a nympho tart.”  

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