Saturday 14 March 2015

A ditty of pity for poor Pitius by Grant Harbison


Pampered Pitius left his home
Forsaking his delight for decadent Rome
He left to roam with his legion
To conquer new lands and their regions
They were met with resistance
But it was no contest
For his soldiers were proficient
Simply the best
They fought with fire
They fought with zest
Pitius was pitiless in his quest
And mile after mile he continued to smile
Until they sailed the channel to the Angel Isle
There his smile did wane
Because all it did was bloody rain
But they fought like Romans and didn’t give a jot
That was until they met the Scot
They stared in amazement at the blue painted faces
And in fright they all took a few backward paces
“Let us by or be prepared to die,” cried Pitius.
“Take yer Roman scum an’ away ye go hame,” responded the leader of the Scots. “If yer gonnae mess wi’ us, ye’ll have yerselves tae blame.”
So began the Roman fall

And they called for Hadrian to come and build a wall

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